March 3rd, 2017


Be The Yogurt

The other day I had some yogurt that was low-fat, super thick, and contained only natural flavors. Someone else had picked it up and left it in our fridge and I thought "I like yogurt" so I thought I would give this a try, that at the worst it was still yogurt.

It lied to me.

That yogurt was not good. Each bite was a small piece of nastiness rolled into a ball of dislike. And I ate the whole thing.

There's supposed to be a long thing here about why I continued to eat the yogurt. It's supposed to be interesting. I'm having trouble writing it. Here's the basics:

"If it was so bad, why did you continue to eat it?!"

Three basic reasons:

  1. I like yogurt and it's yogurt so I should like it.

  2. I kept thinking my previous impression was wrong; somehow it was my fault I didn't like it.

  3. Maybe the next bite would be better.

And all I can keep thinking is that maybe I'm the yogurt to some people. They stick around because they expect the next bite to be better. They think the last bite couldn't have been as bad as they remember. I've displayed characteristics of awesomeness in the past so I'm awesome and they should like me.

I can't promise I'm going to get better or be awesome. Tomorrow will be much like today.

This was supposed to be longer, more interesting, and fun to read.

Instead, I'm just going to go back to sleep and stop trying to be flavorful for the next bite.

I'm sorry for being the yogurt.

It's completely okay to throw it out before finishing. The next bite will probably be the same as the last one.